McDonald's company wants to be something more than it appears to be and it needs you to embrace its new ways.
In fact, it wants you to be loving it so much that you'll want to take a Big Mac to bed.
In any case, please welcome the McDelivery Collection.
This is precisely what those two words lead you to fear -- a McDonald's apparel line.
Though if you take a look at some of these items on Adweek, you might think that Ronald would look very fetching (and a little more modern) sporting them.
For here is a Big Mac onesie. And look, over there, that's a World Famous jogging suit, complete with a little McDonald's Fries logo.
Because if there's one thing you need reminding of when you're jogging, it's to get some French Fries on the way back.
You can get those flip-floppy slides -- yes, like Mark Zuckerberg prefers -- with World Famous on them too.
There's a picnic blanket, too. And, oh, a Nugget Dunker.
My favorite, though, has to be the pillow case set.
Please conceive that you could go to bed with your face planted against a Big Mac and then wake up in the morning, having drooled all over it for seven hours.
As with all chi-chi fashion collections, this one has limited availability. (And, one hopes, appeal.)
You have to go to this site and pray that the pillow case and the slightly more tasteless stuff will be offered in your area.
It's all, of course, a ruse to get you to use McDonald's UberEATS delivery service on July 26.
Why then? It's Global Delivery Day. You mean you didn't know? Surely you were already thinking about dressing up for it.
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